Let us test and examine our ways, and return to the Lord.                                                          Lamentations 3:40

Give all your worries to Him because He cares for you.                                                                                I Peter 5:7

We have been dealing with the effects of the COVID-19 crisis for the better part of  3 months now, and it has been wearing on us mentally and emotionally. For many, it has brought horrible physical suffering. But everyone has been affected somehow by this loathsome little virus.

I noticed a few weeks ago that I was irritable, carrying a low level of anger that seemed to have no real basis. I was building a bit of a “grievance story” to use the words of Frederic Luskin, author of Forgive for Good.  A grievance story is a narrative that we build up when we have been wronged, or perceive that we have been wronged. That story, left unchecked, adds to itself. Then every little thing that goes a little wrong gets added to the story. Pretty soon, we have a good reason to be angry and out of sorts.

So, it’s not hard to start building a grievance story about COVID. We have had losses and we grieve them. I hardly get to see my kids and grandkids. Baseball is not being played in this best of all seasons, Spring. I have to be careful every time I go shopping, sanitize, wear a mask etc. The list could go on and on. And that is the problem. I can easily add to that list, feel that this is not fair, and then respond with anger.

The solution is to be self-aware and honest. I became aware that I was irritable, and that was not helpful to me or those around me. I owned the problem, confessed how I was feeling to those close to me, and it took much of the power away from the negative emotions that I felt. It did not change the situation- I cannot control that. But I could control my reactions to the situation, and that was helpful.

I share this because I think we all need to be honest with how we feel about our current national problem. Honest reflection is good and healing. Becoming aware of our current emotional state is important to maintaining good mental health. May is mental health month, so it is a good time to recognize ways that we can do some simple things to keep a positive outlook in spite of circumstances.

Prayer: Thank you Father for the gift that you give us to self-reflect, and turn all those things over to you, Amen

 

 

 Those of us who are strong and able in the faith need to step in and lend a hand to those who falter, and not just do what is most convenient for us. Strength is for service, not status. Each one of us needs to look after the good of the people around us, asking ourselves, “How can I help?”         Romans 15:1-2 (The Message)

 

The Bible passage is very direct in telling us of the responsibility that we have to be a living model for those around us. In the early Church, the leaders took this very seriously, as it was necessary for the young movement to be as pristine as possible in consistency of the message of love which Jesus pronounced. Therefore, Paul took great pains to explain that we should subjugate our comfort and desires for the good of others and the good of the Gospel.

The word “Role Model” is of relatively recent vintage, coined by Robert Merton, a renowned sociologist, in the 1950’s. The concept however is timeless. We all have a tendency to aspire to the good behavior we see around us- or conversely, to live down to the poor behaviors we see around us. Until we have developed a strong internal moral compass, we are more prone to adapt to the values we see around us.

The early Christian leaders knew this, and they insisted upon a selfless following of the model of Jesus. Without a true canon of Scripture in those early days, the only real message of Jesus was found in the behavior displayed by those who named Jesus as Lord.

Francis of Assisi said that we should “preach the Gospel at all times, using words if necessary” – a succinct and true statement which I really love and quote often.

We are surrounded by sports figures who regularly are held out as “role models”, only to fail at some aspect of their behavior. Our job is to find, and become, those models who are most like Jesus. We will never find perfection in this, but we are called to be on that journey. Indeed, that journey goes best with others who are trying to travel the same road.

Finally, today is the birthday of my older brother, Ed. He has served as my role model for many years, and he has done so much for me. So today big brother, I love you and have a great birthday!

Prayer: Father, we are imperfect models of Jesus, but we aspire to follow Him. We trust in your Holy Spirit to guide us as we submit to Him, Amen.

Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion,  then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind.  Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. Philippians 2:1-4

 

Today is the anniversary of the landmark Supreme Court decision Brown vs. Board of Education– May 17, 1954. It overturned another landmark decision from 1896, Plessy vs. Ferguson, which set the legal precedent of “separate but equal” accommodations and treatment of African-Americans. Such accommodations typically were quite separate, but certainly not equal.

Segregation based upon racism became supported by law by that Plessy decision. However, prior to that decision, it had long been assumed to be some God-given way to conduct society. Attitudes about African-Americans, and indeed other people of color were often skewed by ignorance and fear.

Those racial attitudes over the years had been blended into our culture, and the Brown decision by the Supreme Court changed the law, but it did not change attitudes. As we know, it took many more years of civil rights battles before changes in society became more normalized in combating segregation and discrimination. Of, course, that battle continues. Racism exists today, and it is part of our brokenness.

Each of us must look into our own heart and mind to find attitudes which are not healthy or helpful. Yes indeed, we all have them. In 12-Step work it is the 4^th step where people seeking true recovery from whatever binds them, take a “fearless and searching moral inventory of my character defects”. Such a journey of self-discovery is difficult, but freeing.

We look back now on Brown vs. Board of Education as obviously inherently right. It is the law of the land. Is it the law of our hearts? We can celebrate the fact that our system of laws, while  flawed, has the resiliency to remedy its mistakes. We too can remedy the flaws in our attitudes and heart, and move ahead renewed.

Prayer, Father, thank you for your plans of restoration, plans to heal us and prosper us. Give us the humility to follow that daily, Amen.

 

He (Jesus) said, “You’ve observed how godless rulers throw their weight around, how quickly a little power goes to their heads. It’s not going to be that way with you. Whoever wants to be great must become a servant. Whoever wants to be first among you must be your slave. That is what the Son of Man has done: He came to serve, not be served—and then to give away his life in exchange for the many who are held hostage.”                                                                                                                            Matthew 20:25-28 (The Message) 

I mentioned a few days ago that I am reading a book titled The Splendid and the Vile by Erik Larson. I just finished it, actually, and I enjoyed it immensely. The book is a look into the crisis year of May, 1940 to May, 1941 when England stood virtually alone against the evil plague of Hitler’s Nazi Germany.

The comparison and contrast of leadership between England and Germany is fascinating. Both Hitler and Churchill were strong and passionate leaders. Both had the ability to sway the hearts of the people that they led. Both had soaring oratorical gifts, in an era when speeches were the currency of leading political thought.

The contrast came in how each conceptualized his position. Hitler had become able to convince people that he was the savior of the German State, and that people must put complete trust in him.

Churchill led and served differently.

Once, one of Churchill’s government ministers told Churchill that the best thing he had done was to “give the people courage”. Churchill replied, “I never gave them courage, I was able to focus theirs”.

There is the crucial difference between the two leaders. Hitler was able to make people believe in him, Churchill was able to make people believe in themselves.

Prayer: Father, thank you for the message of sending your Son to show us servant leadership, Amen

Today’s reflection is going to be a departure from my daily posts. I am re-running a column I did for a local newspaper after the terror attacks on September 11, 2001. The current COVID-19 crisis that Americans (and the rest of the world) currently face is an opportunity to respond in a way that will make us better for having gone through it.

In that old column, I pointed out that the very things that are meant for destruction can highlight a new dawn if we “use the crisis well” I reprint this column in the hope that it is an encouragement to you.

 The effects of the murderous terrorist attacks last week will be felt for a very long time. There are many painful, sad, gut wrenching results, of course. But there have been, and will continue to be, good things that come out of this awful tragedy.  The terrorists intended pure evil, but some of the effects will be to our everlasting good.

The terrorists intended to cause pain and death, fear and chaos. They wanted to plant the seed that we are not safe anywhere. They wanted us to see that we are vulnerable, and that we can no longer feel insulated from the events around the world that some people live with daily. They correctly understand that we have depended upon our national intelligence network, the FBI, CIA, and various other governmental agencies for our security. While these agencies are now under scrutiny, and even attack, by many Americans for not having protected us, I do not join in that attack.  I recognize that no agency, no government is able to totally protect us. 

Americans want guarantees. We want to make sure that someone is responsible if something goes wrong. We want to feel like we are a special people, never having had foreign invaders on our soil at least since, perhaps, the War of 1812. We want to feel that we are safe from the wars and killing on foreign shores. The events of Tuesday, September 11, 2001 changed all that forever.

What the terrorists did was to wake us from that unreality. We are vulnerable to attack, and we cannot totally guarantee safety. Indeed, the terrorists taught us a painful lesson. But at the same time, the terrorists sowed in us the seed of new growth. They unintentionally reminded us (or taught some of us for the first time) that our safety and security is not in the hands of the government, as great as that government is. The terrorists sparked the nation to turn in unprecedented numbers to God for protection, guidance and comfort. Immediately after the attacks that day, people were mobilized to turn to God in prayer. Churches, synagogues and mosques opened their doors to people to come together and pray. We were instantly reminded that our help is in God.  So, unwittingly, these evil men helped to turn us to dependence on the only One who can protect and heal us.

Indeed too, out of the physical rubble in New York City, comes the renewed resolve to rebuild. We will rebuild the buildings, and we will renew our love for our country and one another. America has always responded to challenges, and she has always come through it stronger and a little wiser. The terrorists did not understand that in the rubble and pain that they caused, they also planted seeds of hope, strength, and renewal. Those seeds will grow and make us stronger as a nation.

Earlier in this column I mentioned the War of 1812. One of the things that came out of that war was the Star Spangled Banner, written, of course, by Francis Scott Key as he watched the British attack on Baltimore. As I listened intently these past few days to the words of the National Anthem, I heard at a new level the words “… and the rockets red glare, the bombs bursting in air, gave proof through the night that our flag was still there…” The very bombs that were meant to rain destruction, actually lit up the night, and gave proof that our flag still stood. The same aggression that the terrorists rained on us on September 11, will give proof that we still stand, stronger than ever.

From Point of View, September 14, 2001

 

Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm.                                                                                                                       Ephesians 6:13 (English Standard Version)

 

The old battle cry, in the days of armor, was “Gird up your loins for battle”. Soldiers literally had to put on heavy armor before they went off to battle. Battle then was typically grisly face-to-face, hand–to-hand battle, and if you were not properly armored, you stood little chance of survival.

The battle Paul talked about in Ephesians was against evil. The battle most of us think of these days is against the unseen evil of a virus. We understand that this is a battle. We need to be prepared, armed and armored to defeat it. But at times we feel so helpless, and therefore, frustrated. So, I take heart from this passage.

Do all the things you are supposed to do. Take all the hygiene precautions that are appropriate and important. Help friends and neighbors to the extent that you can. Support local merchants to the extent that you can.  Be honest with how you feel and think, and share it with others for support and encouragement. Be aware of the internal battle for the mind that evil always triggers. Wrestle with God about how we should respond. In other words, do all the things you can do to battle and deal with this virus!

Having done all that, stand firm. You have done what you can do. Allow God to do what you cannot do.

Prayer: Lord, give me peace where I find no peace, and help me to stand firm, knowing that you have the answers I do not, Amen.

For I will pour water on the thirsty land, and streams on the dry ground; I will pour out my Spirit on your offspring, and my blessing on your descendants. They will spring up like grass in a meadow, like poplar trees by flowing streams.                                                                                                                  Isaiah 44:3-4 

Isaiah 44:3-4 talks about the outpouring of water on a thirsty land. The Israelites lived in a semi-arid land, where water often was scarce. People depended on the “early and latter rains” for the crops to have any chance of flourishing. Starvation was possibly one missed late season rainfall away. Water on a thirsty land was a metaphor very close to their hearts. The prophet Isaiah used this analogy to describe the effect of the Spirit of God on his people. He likened the Spirit to the life giving waters in a desert land.

What was true then in ancient Israel is true today. Water is essential for physical life, and the Spirit of God is essential for spiritual life. The Spirit of God was moving over the waters in creation, and the Spirit of God is moving in the hearts of believers. Paul said in his letter to the Corinthians that spiritual things can only be discerned with the guidance of the Holy Spirit of God. We cannot know God aside from the guidance and direction of His Spirit.

I find “dry” times in my spiritual life at times, just as the desert is dry without the life-giving waters provided by the rain. The Spirit of God is the only one who can refresh my dry spirit. Yet this Spirit, the power of creating the universe, can be quelled by my indifference, my failure to yield, my pride, my sense of entitlement.

Think of a drink of cool water on a blistering hot day after you have been deprived of water for a while. Like that water from the garden hose after playing in the sun when you were a kid. Remember how refreshing that was?! It renewed your physical body, and you actually were revived. The Holy Spirit of God does that for our souls when we allow him to guide our thoughts and actions. 

Prayer: Father, I thank you for your Spirit, whom you have placed in my heart. I know that the Spirit gives life, and it gives my soul refreshment. I will acknowledge His leading today, and I will give you the praise, Amen.

 

Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.                                                                                                                                            Romans 12:2 (New Living Translation)

I am reading a book by Erik Larson titled The Splendid and the Vile. I love history, and I read just about any book about Winston Churchill. This book covers both bases for me. One of the facts that struck me was the response of Londoners during the horrible bombing we have come to know as “the Blitz”.  During those awful days early in World War II, in summer and fall of 1940, London was being bombed daily. The physical and emotional toll was dreadful, yet Churchill managed to provide strong, courageous leadership to all of England, and London in particular.

One passage of the book discusses the frustration of people who were being bombed, and their feeling of helplessness to fight back. Indeed, the RAF was heroic and even successful in turning back the Luftwaffe, but all wondered how long this small air force could continue to stand against the might of Germany.

Churchill heard people questioning, after another terrible raid on London, why the anti-aircraft guns were mostly silent. Churchill knew that the efficiency of those ant-aircraft guns was miserable. It was estimated that it took 6000 rounds of fire to score one hit on a German aircraft. The air ministry had decided to save ammunition for an anticipated invasion of England, and they did not deploy the guns in every German raid. But people questioned Churchill about fighting back. They could endure the attacks- their courage and tenacity still strikes me as amazing- however, they could not stand those attacks unless they felt that England was fighting back.

Churchill realized this, and he ordered that the anti-aircraft guns once again blaze away during those attacks on London. People took heart in hearing those guns. The pounding shocks of the firing and the dazzling bursts of fire they put into the sky gave people hope- they were fighting back.

So I began to think about our own response to the invisible enemy COVID-19. We can’t simply endure. We must feel active in our fight against it. In my opinion, it is a matter of thinking about it differently. For example, every time I wash my hands, I am potentially killing a virus. Every time I wear a mask, I reduce chances of the virus spreading. You know how viruses are extinguished? When they have no place to propagate. Every time I wipe down a surface with a disinfectant, I am taking away another breeding ground for the virus.

Of course there are many things people do to fight the virus. We serve and support the front-line fighters, we help those who have been infected, etc. The point is, we are in the fight, we are not just enduring it.

Prayer: Lord, help us to change our mind about things in this life that make us feel powerless. Give us the renewed mind to push ahead, even when we cannot see the enemy, Amen

You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on a cross.                                               Philippians 2:5-8

The essential tenet of Christian belief is that Jesus came to earth, conceived in a miraculous way, and died to save a sinful people. He was a divine being who gave up the privileges of Deity in order to save a mankind that had turned its back on God. He took on the humility of being a human being, and gave up the privileges he owned and deserved.

This is a very hard concept for us, and understandably so. It involves miracles and faith, and it stretches our understanding of both God and man. That Jesus was fully human and fully God is a theological concept that is way beyond my ability to explain or even understand. Yet, in so many ways it is a beautiful way of understanding the world. It is an elegant explanation of how God loves his creation, and it also challenges our humility to say, “I accept this, but I do not really understand it”.

It also, for me, begs the question, “so, if Jesus was fully human, did he make mistakes?”  My answer is yes, he certainly did. He made mistakes but he didn’t sin (Hebrews 4:15). Sins involve deliberate behaviors with selfish or prideful motives. Mistakes are, well, mistakes.

In 1973, the eminent psychiatrist Karl Menninger wrote a book titled Whatever Became of Sin? The book discussed the moral decline of America which had taken place over the preceding decades before the publishing of the book. As a psychiatrist, Menninger was keenly aware of the moral dimensions of human failures and the price that people pay emotionally for such failures. He took to task the society which had excused moral excesses in the name of freedom. He asked the simple question, “Is anything considered to be wrong anymore?”

That was a good question then, and it still is today. It brings to mind to me the important distinction between mistakes and moral failures. I will share with you that a pet peeve of mine is the juxtaposition of the term “mistake” for what are obvious moral failures.

One does not have to look too far to see this subtle refuge for those who have crossed a moral boundary, and who cover it by claiming the innocence of a “mistake”. After all, everyone makes mistakes, right? Allow me to expound.

Let’s say you file your income tax and you have made a math error on the return. As a result, you are due a refund of an extra $100. That was a mistake.

Your friend also files his tax return, but he deliberately fudges a number which results in his receiving an extra $100 on his tax refund. That was cheating, a moral failure. The results were the same, but the intent was different. That is the difference between a mistake, and a moral failure, or, if you will, sin.

How many times have we heard athletes or actors, or politicians, caught in a transgression, plead that they have “made a mistake” and ask to be forgiven. The politician is caught in an affair, becomes contrite and accepts that he “made a mistake.” The athlete takes steroids, gets caught, and then pleads that he “made a mistake” and asks the public to embrace him again.

Let’s be clear that the above examples are NOT examples of mistakes. They are wrong behaviors watered down to “mistake” so that the behavior can be mitigated and the crime minimized. My mere suggestion is that we be clear about what is a mistake and what is a sin.  I believe in forgiveness, no matter if it is a simple mistake, or if it is a moral failure. However, for the sake of the individual who needs the forgiveness, it is crucial to understand that “sin” is of deliberate intent, and it needs to be acknowledged as such.

As a counselor, I try to help people get moral clarity. I do not judge people, but I do help them to take a moral self-inventory (the 4^th step of 12 Step programs) so that they can move ahead from past failures.  Acknowledging our failures, as well as differentiating them from honest mistakes, is important in the healing process- it is the start of it.

We all indeed make mistakes, and we all make wrong moral choices at times. I believe that if we can understand the difference, and own what we do, we are then able to heal and move ahead.

Prayer: Thank you Lord for forgiveness, no matter if we make mistakes or sin. Help us have the discernment and humility to know and own the differences, Amen.

Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.                                                                                                                       Ephesians 4:15

We spend a lot of time on social media, and in many of our conversations, trying to convince other people of something. There is really nothing wrong with that. When we have strong convictions, we want others to see things our way, believing that is the best for all involved. So, we express our opinion, and we go to some lengths to lay it out in such a manner that people must “surely see that this opinion is correct and full of truth.”

And while we believe that, we often cross the line and make the dangerous leap that if people do not see things our way, they must be dull, or ignorant- uninformed and likely in need of correction. We spend much more time trying to convince others than in listening to a response that may not line up with our opinion.

Of course social media is rife with such rants as the marketplace for public opinion. As one scribe put it, it is the “friction-less platform for publishing ideas”. Everyone has opinions, and many put them to writing. (Including me- right now!) It is available, free, and ubiquitous. Yet the line is crossed when we make the leap that those who do not line up with us are bad or evil, and that their motivations are wrong, even harmful.

I have a list I developed for couples named the “Fair Fighting Rules”. Some of these rules may help in the exchange of ideas. I have listed some of those rules (these are just the last few):

• Speak the truth in love – our job is to speak the truth, not to convince someone of how right we are.

• Allow the possibility of being wrong, or that you may not be seeing the whole picture
  

• Become aware of your current feeling level (getting angry, frustrated, etc.) and own it- do not blame it on the other person. Your emotional response may be coming from something that is not currently part of the discussion, but from possible past hurts, etc.
  

• Try to put yourself in the shoes of the other person and understand how they are seeing it. That does not mean that they are “right”, or even that you need to agree with it; just be willing to try to see the world the way that they see it.
  

It is the last point I want to challenge my readers with. Try to argue the point of the other person. You do not need to agree with it. Indeed, you probably do not. But, try to argue it from their worldview. In trials, a good prosecutor can argue the defense case very well, and vice versa. It helps to shape our own position, and might even challenge it. Allowing for a truth we do not see is important, even invaluable. If you can really understand the worldview of the one with whom you disagree, it may be easier to trust their motives.

If you cannot convince the other person, fine. Just be content with having done your job- of speaking the truth in love.

Prayer: Father, thank you for giving us the minds to reason, and the grace to listen, Amen