Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse Philippians 4:8-9

Have you ever heard of Norman Borlaug? Neither had I. Funny how we often do not hear of the news that is the most uplifting and world changing. It turns out that Mr. Borlaug had a lot to do with the “Green Revolution” of the 1950’s and 60’s which helped to turn much of the world’s arable land into productive, food producing, land due to his meticulous research. His work with making hybrid wheat strains likely has saved tens of thousands, perhaps millions, of people from starvation. He won the 1970 Nobel Peace Prize for his work.

In this year of 2020, we are inundated with bad news. You need not look far for pain, misery and doom. That is because the news essentially singles out such stories because they are both sudden and newsworthy. Bad news arises quickly, generally, and it grabs headlines.

Good news, on the other hand, is with us all the time, and it is not, therefore, newsworthy. It is not “breaking news”, it is normal life. For example, the fact that there is less starvation now worldwide than ever in history, is not newsworthy. Partly, that is also due to the fact that it is hard to celebrate less starvation when starvation still exists in the world.

We cannot blame news media for this phenomenon. News is made up of events that are new, interesting, and important. The fact that there are wildfires and hurricanes happening is absolutely true. Those events are devastating in real time to thousands of people, and it is important to note.

At the same time, there are many, many things and events in the world that are good news, but they are swallowed by other pressing events. That is simply a matter of life. We need to remember however, the important fact that there are many incredible achievements that go unnoticed.

People like Norman Borlaug.

Prayer: Help us remember your grace and provision for us, even in the midst of bad news, Amen

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.                                                                                                                                                     I John 4:18

I recently had a conversation with a client about codependency and how that differs from a more mature kind of loving relationship. The Bible says that “perfect love casts out fear”. I take this to mean that “perfect love” is secure. One does not need to worry about that kind of love failing or going away. That mature kind of love is secure because it will not be withheld or withdrawn when there is an argument or disagreement.

Codependent love tries to mold another into something for the good of the lover. Love becomes an appendage that reflects rather than builds up. Threats and fear are not in the equation of real love. If there is a hint of bondage, that “I love you because I fear losing love”, it may be codependency.

 Indeed, sacrifice and encouragement are the hallmarks of the mature love. None of us are perfect at love, just as we are not perfect in anything. Yet we are called by God to “love our neighbor as ourselves”- a very high calling and impossible to do without supernatural help.

God’s love for us is unconditional, secure, and not dependent on our good behavior.

That is certainly reassuring, right?

Prayer: Father, you show us real love, and we often miss the mark with our own, Amen  

“If you grow a healthy tree, you’ll pick healthy fruit. If you grow a diseased tree, you’ll pick worm-eaten fruit. The fruit tells you about the tree.                                                                                                                               Matthew 12:33 (The Message)

The last few days I have been talking about small changes we can make in our life that can deliver big results if practiced over time. I explain to my clients that we are physical, spiritual, and emotional beings, and that we need to pay attention to all aspects of our being to be healthy.

So, in considering some small disciplines, I suggest that they choose one little discipline that they begin to practice in each of those life areas- physical, spiritual, and emotional. For example, physical might be a 15- minute walk, getting to bed 15 minutes earlier, or rising 15 minutes earlier. Emotional might be downloading an app that helps awareness or mindfulness, or maybe journaling for a few minutes each day about the best thing that happened that day. Spiritual might be a 10- minute devotional, or reading, or listening to music that moves your soul.  

Really, whatever they choose is fine. I simply say to them, choose simple and achievable. You are worse off saying you will do it and then not doing it, than never having started at all.

I ask my clients to give me a quick check-in on where they are on each of those levels in their life. Just a “quick and dirty” snapshot of where they think they may be. I give a range of 1-10, with 10 being the best, and 1 the lowest. “How would you rate your physical, spiritual, and emotional health right now?”

They come up with an answer, and it is totally subjective, of course. But it gives us a baseline, and therefore a way to measure. I then might say, “You indicated a “5” on physical, what might you need to do to get that to a 5.5?” I may do the same for the other scales. I also ask my client where they want to start. It could be in any of the dimensions, because improvement in one dimension improves the others. They are all connected.

As you can see, I like to be practical and specific. This gives the client control of each of the areas of their life, and they can see that taking charge with a behavior change will affect emotions positively.

 Actions come before feelings- we don’t wait to feel good in order to take action- we take actions in order to feel good.

Prayer: Father, we are made so intricately and interconnected. Help us to work on health in all areas of our life, Amen.

There’s more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we’re hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next…                                             Romans 5:3-4 (The Message)

I have written in blogs past about making small, deliberate, practical changes in order to gain more of a sense of peace and control in our life. Built up over time, such regular disciplines lead to enduring positive change. The key word here is “time”. We all want to feel better right away. We are the epitome of a culture of instant gratification, and we have an insatiable need for immediate results.  

That is why weight loss, for example, is advertised in extreme terms. “Lose 30 pounds in 30 days!” Fat sculpting surgery seems to be the remedy for removal of unwanted fat. On and on we see that immediate relief is wanted, indeed expected. I too have the same malady. When my computer, for example, does not instantly respond to my commands, I can become irritated.

I tell my clients that the drugs that are addictive are the ones that give immediate relief. Indeed, anything that gives immediate relief and pleasure becomes addictive. Food, sex, alcohol, pain killers, gambling, pornography, and other forms of immediate pleasure, all have an addictive potential.

The slow, steady approach to life changes is the only way that works in the long run. No, it is not easy, nor is it quick. However, that approach does work, and it has been thus ever since the world began. We just think that we have a better, quicker way to do things.

Innovation, inventions and other time and labor-saving devices are remarkable and they are a blessing. However, when it comes to human behavior and life changes, slow and steady always wins.

Prayer: Lord, help us to have the patience and discipline to make the lasting changes you would have for us, Amen.

“Things don’t have to change the world to be important” -Steve Jobs

“The measure of intelligence is the ability to change” -Albert Einstein

Often, I will ask my clients to think about one little thing in their life that they could change. I explain that this would be something that they actually can control, not an external thing like a raise at work or a neighbor’s lawn. This needs to be one very small, practical, measurable thing that they can intentionally do that might make them feel just a little better, a little more peaceful, a little more in control.

I give examples like waking up 15 minutes earlier or getting to bed 15 minutes earlier. Maybe it is taking 5 minutes to read a little devotional in the morning. Maybe it is greeting the first person they see with a smile. It could be anything, but it must be small, measurable, very practical and easily replicated.

Typically, a client will agree to try something like that and practice it for a week or two and report back on the results. The point of the homework is that even very small, practical changes can make a difference in our quality of life. It does not take dramatic changes to make us feel a little more peaceful and a little bit more in control.

The point of this exercise is that we do have the power to make significant changes in our life, starting with very small, practical habits. There is an old adage, “Change one thing, change everything”. If we change one little thing in our life, we see a difference, and we are encouraged to continue that thing, and perhaps expand the practice.  

So, consider one little thing in your daily habit that you might want to change. Remember, it must be small, practical and measurable. Try it, and see what happens.

Little things make up most of our life. Added up, they make a life.

Prayer: Father, thank you for your grace, and the opportunities to decide to make changes, Amen

Soon another Feast came around and Jesus was back in Jerusalem. Near the Sheep Gate in Jerusalem there was a pool, in Hebrew called Bethesda, with five alcoves. Hundreds of sick people—blind, crippled, paralyzed—were in these alcoves. One man had been an invalid there for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him stretched out by the pool and knew how long he had been there, he said, “Do you want to get well?”

 The sick man said, “Sir, when the water is stirred, I don’t have anybody to put me in the pool. By the time I get there, somebody else is already in.”

 Jesus said, “Get up, take your bedroll, start walking.” The man was healed on the spot. He picked up his bedroll and walked off                                                                                                                                                   John 5:1-9 (The Message)

My interpretation of this passage lets me think that Jesus will confront people who look at themselves as victims. Jesus came upon a man who had lain crippled at the healing pool for 38 years. That’s a long time to hang out waiting for help. The man complained that he had no one to help him get into the pool when the water was stirred up. This makes me think that his bigger problem had to do with isolation and lack of connection with people than he had with his paralysis.

Nonetheless, Jesus gave him a chance to finally get his healing. However, Jesus asked the operative question. “Do you want to get healed?” Funny question you may say, but there is a deeper truth at stake. Sometimes people aren’t willing to do the work or make the hard stretch to get well. For whatever reason, some people make the choice, deliberately or perhaps unknowingly, to stay in their misery. Even misery is at least predictable, and it takes the risk of change in order to get full healing. It often takes hard work to get well. We may need surgery, rehabilitation, 12 Step work, counseling- whatever- in order to get well.

Jesus gave the man one more chance. But even then, Jesus challenged him to “pick up his mat and walk”. The man needed to participate in his healing in order to make it happen.

The message is this- if we want to get well, that is, healing from whatever affliction we have, we need to make the reach, and decide that we need help.

Then we need to act on it.

Prayer: Thank you Father for healing. Help us to see our need to ask and to seek your complete healing, Amen

This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.                                                               Psalm 118:24

My old friend Pastor Michael Bowie used to say “They call it the present because it is a gift”. He likes to play on words, and he is good at it. His point is, enjoy today, because it is a gift and we will never get it again. How true. How much time do I waste in looking ahead to an uncertain future, or looking back into an idyllic past?

Anxiety is typically future focused. “What bad thing might happen?” “What if that happens?” That goes on and on in the mind of people who suffer from anxiety. Similarly, people who suffer from depression often have thoughts dominated by the past.  The things that “used to be better”.

In fact, researchers say that our memories of the past are typically skewed by certain mindsets, and that our recall is not as absolute as we would like to think. That however is the topic of another day.

Today, let’s just savor the moment. Accept the gift that is today, and have gratitude for another opportunity to experience our friends, family, and the amazing creation in which we live.

Prayer: Thank you for the gift of today. Help us use it wisely, Amen.

“I’ve told you these things for a purpose: that my joy might be your joy, and your joy wholly mature. This is my command: Love one another the way I loved you. This is the very best way to love. Put your life on the line for your friends                                                                                                                                              John 15:11-13 (The Message)

The heroes are in plain sight, we just overlook them. Last evening, I was privileged to be part of a meeting of foster and adoptive fathers. I am on the board of a foster care agency, and I participated in a group of men who shared their experiences of being dads to kids whom they adopted and/or fostered. These men shared stories about having adopted special needs kids and they talked about some of the things they do to provide care for those kids.

They do not see themselves as heroic by any means. They see themselves as simply having a calling to care for and love kids whom others have abused or abandoned. They and their wives give of themselves to provide care for kids who had been traumatized by abuse or neglect. One dad shared a story about spending up to an hour every night, for several years, gently tapping the forehead of a little girl who could otherwise not fall asleep unless he provided this soothing touch.

Other men shared about their fears and concerns for their kids who had intellectual deficits, or who were lacking social abilities or awareness. They wondered how their kids would do in a world that was not understanding or accepting of their kids. They shared the highs and lows of being a foster or adoptive dad and the price that they paid for this.

Let me be clear- they were not complaining or seeking pity. Far from it. They had a bit of a hard time when I called them heroes in my eyes. They sought neither credit nor pity. They simply came together to support one another and to share their experiences.

Heroes do that sort of thing. They don’t advertise their virtue. So, I will call them heroes even if they will not do that themselves (and they won’t).

So, if you sometimes feel that people are not caring or sacrificing themselves for the good of others, you might be overlooking someone right next door.

Prayer: Thank you Father for giving us the command and the opportunity to love and care for others, Amen

Words kill, words give life;
    they’re either poison or fruit—you choose                                                                                                              Proverbs 18:21 (The Message)

As a bit of a follow up to my discussion about masks and their effect on communication, I was reminded of a bit from an old TV show. So, let’s get into the “Wayback Machine” and travel back to the 1950’s.

Some of you of a certain age will remember the Dobie Gillis Show. It was about a young man named Dobie Gillis, and it featured his friends, notably his best pal and hippie forerunner Maynard G. Krebs. Back then, they were called “Beatniks”, but I digress.

Dobie was always at odds with his father, often over money. Dobie had no money, and his father had little himself. One time, Dobie was explaining to Maynard (yes, it was Bob Denver, aka “Gilligan” from you know what show) the absurdity of an idea that Maynard had about Dobie  borrowing money from his father. Dobie broke it down like this:

“Me borrow money from my father?” stated Dobie. “None of that makes any sense Maynard. Think about that sentence. Emphasize each word and you will see how impossible that is.”                           ME borrow money from my father?  (Maybe someone else, not me); Me BORROW money from my father? (Maybe steal it, but he would never lend it to me); Me borrow MONEY from my dad? (maybe something else, but never money); Me borrow money from MY dad? (maybe I could borrow money from your dad, but not mine); Me borrow money from my DAD? (maybe mom, but never dad).

The meaning and nuance of the sentence changes with every emphasis on a different word. A fun lesson in how we determine meaning from even the emphasis on a syllable or word.

So, communication is dependent upon a lot of things, including where we put our emphasis.  Words are important, and even the emphasis we place on that word. In this day of lots of words, and attributions of meaning of every nuance of the word, we need to be careful about our words. They give life, and they can diminish it. Let’s make sure our words are used to build up, not tear down.

Prayer: Lord, help us guard our words, their meaning, and their intent, Amen.

“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”                                                   Mahatma Gandhi

“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.”                                                 Mark Twain

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love                                                                                                                        I John 4:18

 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, if my brother keeps on sinning against me, how many times do I have to forgive him? Seven times?” “No, not seven times,” answered Jesus, “but seventy times seven…                                                                                                                                                        Matthew 18:21-22

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.”                                                                                                                                                              Martin Luther King, Jr.

These are some rather poetic words, spoken by immortal thinkers and purveyors of wisdom. There are untold numbers of such quotes, from great thinkers, writers, the Bible, and other wisdom sources. In these times when wisdom is in short supply, when love is not the first solution chosen to deal with our problems, I thought that I would just give a few quotes to consider today.

Several are about forgiveness. We need that every day, and we need to give it every day. Maybe that is why Jesus made the standard so generous.

Think about these quotes, and decide which one is the most meaningful for you today. They are all great quotes, but maybe one will just stand out to you. I hope so.

Enjoy a day of peace and love!  

Prayer: Thank you Lord for the wisdom that comes from you and through your servants, Amen.