I cry out to God; yes, I shout. Oh, that God would listen to me!
When I was in deep trouble, I searched for the Lord.
All night long I prayed, with hands lifted toward heaven,
    but my soul was not comforted.I think of God, and I moan,
    overwhelmed with longing for his help. You don’t let me sleep.
    I am too distressed even to pray!

Psalm 77:1-4

Nights can be hard. Fall has once again begun to descend, and with it comes less daylight. The night period is longer and it changes our rhythms. We get accustomed to these changes in light, generally, but many people suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder, and they dread the onset of winter. The amount of light we receive affects our brain chemistry, and it causes us to have changes in mood. This, I believe, is both psychological and physical. The amount of serotonin is affected by these changes, and that results in less availability of that natural chemical which signals us to feel good. Often, these changes are subtle and minor, but sometimes, they can wreak havoc with our moods.

Night time is also hard for people who are struggling with depression and anxiety. Every thought seems to be compounded by the absence of comforting light. Light seems to give us hope and reassurance. Night time can be isolating and lonely, exacerbating fears and giving a sense of gloom that may not be present in the daytime.

David struggled with depression it seems, and he wrote about this in Psalm 77. He too was beset by problems sleeping. He had thoughts that would not quit, and they kept him from restful sleep. He wondered where God was in his time of need. He cried for help and seemed to come up empty. He felt helpless and hopeless.

Have you been there? You are not alone. Even David felt this sense of profound hopelessness, and it took him a while to finally get comfort.

Tomorrow we will look at some of his remedies.

Prayer: Father, we turn to you in time of trouble. We seek you for comfort. Be with us in time of need, Amen

Like apples of gold in settings of silver Is a word spoken at the right time.                                    Proverbs 25:11

I read a book several years ago titled A Theology as Big as the City by Ray Bakke.  Lots of good stuff in the book, but one of the big takeaways for me was the idea that the church ought to serve as a chaplain to the city, or the area where it is located. Chaplains serve people with spiritual and emotional care at times of stress and crisis. We have hospital chaplains, military chaplains, hospice chaplains, police chaplains, even a chaplain for the U.S. Congress. That tells me that we value the spiritual care for people in critical situations.

The same goes for just us ordinary folks too. Heaven knows that there are daily stresses in our life that could be helped with the aid of a chaplain once in a while. The local church- that is the people who are part of that church (all of us, not the “pastor” necessarily), should be chaplains to the community we live in. We need to be ready to serve as the chaplain to the neighbor, friend, or even stranger who needs help, giving spiritual and emotional support.

If people saw the local church as a place where healthy, caring chaplains came from, they may be more inclined to check out what that church has to offer.

Just a thought…

Prayer: Lord, help us see the needs around us, and give us the will and courage to reach to help, Amen

A person’s conscience is the Lord’s searchlight exposing the hidden motives          Proverbs 20:27

I spoke with a client not long ago who was struggling with inadequacy, especially regarding his income. While he was earning a decent living, and was not in debt, he was triggered to feel inadequate when he discussed finances with his wife. After some discussion about this, I asked him what his “self-talk” was about how he felt. How did he internally process the feelings he was having?

He talked about his family of origin, as well as some past financial plans he had made, etc., and I asked him to consider in his self-assessment the difference in outcomes vs. motives. I explained that we often default to looking at certain outcomes in our life- “did this work out well or poorly for me”? At the same time, we often do not consider our motives. Did I mean to do the right and loving thing? Were my intentions geared toward the best interest of my family or others? Did I do the best I could given the information that I had at the time?

These are motive questions. I am a believer that outcomes are not totally under our control, but our motives are. There can be other circumstances that may hinder the outcome that we desire, but our motives are ours, and we must own them. They are totally under our control. If our motives are good (not perfect, they seldom are), then we can give ourselves grace about outcomes. We may be too hard on ourselves for outcomes without considering our motives.

My client considered that, and that was his takeaway from the session. He recognized that he did have good motives, but the outcomes were not always what he had hoped for, and indeed that is what he judged himself upon.  

So, consider motives when judging yourself. Self-aware people do judge themselves, and that is fine, as long as we do it in a way that is balanced.

 That allows us to give ourselves grace in the process.

Prayer: Lord, help us to extend to ourselves a portion of the grace you give to us, Amen

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.                                                                                                         Matthew 5:8

So, what does it mean to be “pure in heart”? It does not mean a “perfect heart”- that is not possible. It does mean that we have looked into our heart and we have seen it for what it is. It is selfish and pleasure seeking, if left to its own devices. Our job is to cut down on how often it is “left to its own devices”. In other words, we are to be stewards of an inherently selfish nature.

In the book of Jeremiah, the prophet asserts “The heart is hopelessly dark and deceitful, a puzzle that no one can figure out. But I, God, search the heart and examine the mind. I get to the heart of the human. I get to the root of things. I treat them as they really are, not as they pretend to be. Jeremiah 17:9-10

We are clear that we are not perfect in heart, but we can be pure of heart. We can do that by agreeing with God on it. He knows our frailties, and he detests the practice of trying to cover it up, pretending we are something that we are not.

The counseling principle of ownership of our innermost being frees us to become who we are truly meant to be. Truth in agreeing that we are sinners in need of a Savior is the step of freedom and change. It is the “moment of clarity” for those in addiction who now see the need for help in overcoming the addiction. It is the moment of salvation for those who see that they cannot solve the sin problem alone.

I have been fond of writing about the relationship of faith and science. Science can explain and solve many world problems. It cannot solve the sin problem. That is the work for faith.

Prayer: Thank you Father for the solution to our heart problems, your son, Jesus, Amen

Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it Proverbs 22:6

I was speaking to a client recently about child rearing. She and her partner have disagreements on how to discipline their children. He is much more lax in response to their children’s routines and behaviors. She wants a firmer hand in their lives as she sees that they are not learning responsible behaviors.

We discussed the fact that our job is not to make our children happy. It is to make them responsible. When they learn responsibility, happiness can follow. Certainly, we want our children to be happy, yet temporary happiness can merely be the result of immediate gratification. Long term satisfaction comes from a life of good disciplines and responsible behavior that sets kids up for success as adults.

I told the client that counseling is much the same way. The goal of counseling is not to make people happy. The goal of counseling is to help make people responsible- recognizing agency over their own thoughts, feeling and behaviors. When we take ownership of those things we become more responsible, which leads to real happiness.

Prayer: Lord, help us to live into the full happiness that you would have for us, Amen

By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”                      John 13:35

I sometimes listen to a podcast titled Science and God by Dr. Michael Guillen. He is a noted scientist and a strong Christian. He rightly contends that God and science are not enemies, but rather, a “power couple”.

On a recent podcast, he discussed the concept of proof and the idea that there are many things that science cannot prove. Yes, it can disprove many things, but in the strictest sense, proof is an elusive concept.

He went on to say that we cannot prove the existence of God. That is the province of faith. However, we need not be dismayed. This does not diminish the existence of God. Actually, it gives us the opportunity to BE the proof of God.

Jesus explained to his disciples that they (and succeeding generations) are to be the living witness of God’s existence. Certainly, the marvels of creation attest to God’s presence, but people attest to God’s character.

So, the word for today- be the proof of God’s existence and his love for humankind.  

Prayer: Lord, you have given us the great challenge and the great privilege to be the proof of your existence, Amen.

Paul stood up in the middle of the council on Mars Hill and said, “People of Athens, I see that you are very religious in every way. As I was walking through town and carefully observing your objects of worship, I even found an altar with this inscription: ‘To an unknown God.’ What you worship as unknown, I now proclaim to you. God, who made the world and everything in it, is Lord of heaven and earth. He doesn’t live in temples made with human hands Acts 17:16-17

In this present era, we experience a type of communication where people are talking across one another instead of to one another. We see Paul as an example of one who knew how to engage people. Paul had a message of good news which he desperately wanted to share with people, because he believed that spiritual life and death were at stake. Instead of demeaning and mocking the primitive beliefs of the idol worshippers at Athens, Paul showed respect for them in their search for truth. He acknowledged their sincere search for truth, and he showed his interest in their culture. He walked around the city and observed what was important to them. He did not judge them, but pointed out and affirmed their own desire to know the “unknown god”. The Athenians were open to the idea of a god that they did not yet know, and they had made idols to various gods. However, in the interest of not leaving any out lest they anger one of those deities, they made an idol to the “unknown god.”

Paul was able to use their own language and concepts to help introduce them to the God that could offer them peace and salvation. He did not mock their feeble attempts to placate the unknown god, he introduced them to the God of their need, the God that they sought and did not yet know.

Paul’s approach is needed today. We need to listen, and understand the language of people with whom we disagree. We need not, and should not, shame and dishonor those with whom we disagree. We need to love them enough to hear their world view. It may be very different from ours, yet people come to a particular world view for a reason. It is arrived at due to a journey different than our own oftentimes.  

As we enter the heated environment of political rhetoric which is so visible these days, let us pause to understand that with which we disagree. You will read, if you complete the 17^th chapter of Acts, that Paul gained a hearing from the people of Athens because he cared enough to hear their story and their world view, different as it was from his. Let us be intentional in respectfully hearing views with which we disagree.

It is good for our soul, and the souls of those whom we love and yet do not agree with.

Prayer: Lord, grant us the patience to hear what we do not agree with, and the grace to patiently share your love, Amen.

All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty.                                                       Proverbs 14:23

From the fruit of their lips people are filled with good things, and the work of their hands brings them reward.                                                                                                                                                              Proverbs 12:14

Today is Labor Day here in the United States. In many countries, it is celebrated on May1 as Labor Day (or Labour Day), and may also be known as International Workers Day or a similar name. For my friends in Ecuador, I understand it is celebrated on April 30^th.  Whatever you call the day, I hope you can celebrate it as honoring the value of work. I am deliberately disregarding the political overtones that some ascribe to “May Day”, recognizing that workers should be celebrated, no matter the political attachment given to the day.

There are some who have interpreted that work is a curse resulting from the “Fall in the Garden of Eden”. Let me assure you that I am not of such a mind. Indeed, I believe that work is a gift from God. Even before that “great fall” in the garden, Adam had been assigned the work of naming the Creation, as well as tending the garden and its obvious beauty and plenty.

My good friend Pastor Mike Slaughter spoke about work in his Sunday message stating that work should be “honoring to God”; “a blessing to others”; and should “bring joy to the laborer”. This is true. Our labors are an expression of our gifts and talents which we use in the service of others. All work is noble and worthy, and it should be honored.

So, I don’t know how you will celebrate today, but you should be reminded that your labor is worthy.

Celebrate it!

Prayer: Lord, thank you for the gift of work, which gives us value and meaning as we serve your creation, Amen

Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?  Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?             Matthew 6:26-27

I was speaking with a client recently about what might give her more of a sense of serenity. We got around to the subject of what might be a reason that she does not have more peace, and I suggested to her that her serenity cannot be based upon her husband’s behavior. She has spent a great deal of time worrying about whether her husband has been unfaithful to her, as he had been in the past, and she soon realized the truth of the statement- her serenity was not dependent upon her husband’s behavior. This was something beyond her control.

So often we fail to see things that are obvious. In our attempts to find peace of mind, we try and try to figure things out. Somehow, we get the idea that if we put a lot of effort into something, we can get some measure of control. The less energy we give to certain things, the better the outcome.

I am not against hard work by any means! Work is good for the mind, body, and soul. However, when it comes to trying to overthink things over which we have little or no control, The truth is, often, less is more.

Prayer: Lord, help us to discern the things that we can control, and those that we cannot, Amen

 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law                         Galatians 5:22-23

“There are three ways to ultimate success: The first way is to be kind. The second way is to be kind. The third way is to be kind.”

Fred Rogers

The show Mr. Rogers Neighborhood began in 1968, a show that began after my childhood. I was never a fan of the show because I believed that I was too grown up for it. Yes, it would have been a little weird if I watched the show when I was 18 + years old, but at the same time, I sort of ridiculed it as a bit of a show for sissies. You know, all that sappy stuff he talked about with kids. “You’re special”, “show kindness to others” – he hit all the platitudes.

I was wrong about Mr. Rogers.

I fear that today, our example of strong males is men with aggressive behaviors, those belittling others, a goal of winning at all costs, and having a robust sexual life with multiple partners. Fred Rogers was a man who exemplified his faith and manhood even when he was misunderstood. What strength of character!

Well, we sure could use Mr. Rogers today, right? He was a Presbyterian minister who truly lived out his faith. He loved people right where they were, and he encouraged others to do the same. He had a prayer list of people that he prayed for every day. He led a very disciplined life, one dedicated to others, especially children. He was an example, perhaps, of people who are not fully appreciated in their own lifetime.

 I wish he were around now so that I could tell him how much I admired him.

Prayer: Lord, thank you for examples of Godly men like Fred Rogers, Amen