Whoever has ears, let them hear…                                                                                                          Matthew 11:15

What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.

 But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.”

Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds. You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder.                                                                                James 2:14-19

I recently read a book titled Walking in the Dust of Rabbi Jesus. In this book, the author is trying to get the reader in mind of how Jesus taught and thought, and how those who heard him may have received his teachings. 

One of the explanations the author used was that of the Hebrew language. It had a vocabulary of about 80,000 words. Compare that to the English language which has perhaps 400,000 words. Hebrews were used to having a rich and elaborate meaning to their words since they did not parse them out as freely as English-speaking people might. There may be several different associated concepts with one word in the Hebrew language.

When Jesus, for example, used the word “hear”, that meant that the hearer would not only hear the word, but believe it as well. Further, if one believed a concept, they were expected to act upon it as truth. In other words, hearing, believing, and doing were all tied together. If you hear your master tell you something, and believe it, the expectation is that one would act upon that belief.

I find it interesting in Western Christianity, we have somehow been able to separate belief from actions. Somehow, just holding onto a belief can be divorced from actions, causing some to fail to truly live out their faith. For them, holding a belief in the mind becomes paramount over acting out that faith for others to see.

James talked about the kind of faith that works- that is, the kind that other people can see and experience.

Prayer: Lord, help us to be doers of the word, not just hearers, Amen

From time to time, I run a copy of my daughter’s blog, www.traumamom4.com. She is a great writer, and I love to share her work. I know you will enjoy it as much as I do! Here it is…

“You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”                                         Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride.

Blessed. We throw that word around a lot, but I’m not always certain we really grasp what it means. Or the depth of what it could mean. The English language, bless its heart, consistently gives us one word for something that in another language would have multiple words to describe a range of rich meanings. Think about the word love. In Greek, there are many words for love, with nuanced differences. (eros, philia, agape, ludus, pragma, and philautia) We are really missing out on the sweeping beauty of a concept when we limit ourselves to just one word.

I’m still stuck in Matthew 5. Namely, The Beatitudes. It’s so dense, it’s hard to take it all in. I feel like this is the essence of Jesus, right up front. His first sermon. Some of the first red letters we find in the Bible. I’ve been reading it in several different Bible translations. But I am consistently drawn to the Amplified Bible. I find it really helpful to read the commentary in the parentheses that brings richness to the text that we lose with the English language.

In Matthew 5:3-12, Jesus uses the word “blessed” nine times. “Blessed are…for they shall…”. I rearranged the words on a separate page, grouping together all the meanings of blessed, then all the types of people who are blessed (the poor in spirit, those who mourn, etc), and then all the rewards (comfort, mercy, etc). This painted a new picture for me. A more complete picture of the word blessed.

Here is what I learned blessed can mean: (Matthew 5:3-12, Amp Bible)

spiritually prosperous, happy, to be admired

forgiven, refreshed by God’s grace

inwardly peaceful, spiritually secure, worthy of respect

joyful, nourished by God’s goodness

content, sheltered by God’s promises

anticipating God’s presence, spiritually mature

spiritually calm with life-joy in God’s favor

comforted by inner peace and God’s love

morally courageous and spiritually alive with life-joy in God’s goodness

All too often, we use the word blessed flippantly to describe material wealth or comfort. Prosperity theology can be very attractive, but I don’t see that definition anywhere in Jesus’ description of blessed. Jesus doesn’t mean wealth or power, Jesus means peace and joy.

I hope you find new ways to understand blessing. I don’t think it only means what we have reduced it to mean. God bless, y’all!

This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us be full of joy and be glad in it.                                                   Psalm 118:24

Over the years of my counseling practice, I have literally seen thousands of clients. I have been blessed to be in the field for nearly fifty years. (Yes, I did start young!) Over those years, I have been blessed to be a part of the story of so many people. I saw people who struggled with mental illness, relationship problems, anxiety, depression, complicated physical problems, symptoms that resulted from emotional and neurological problems, grief issues- the list goes on.

In that time, I have been so impressed with the human spirit. I saw many clients who dealt with significant problems, to the point that I did not know how they kept going. But the ones who did keep going had a chance at healing and recovery. Some simply needed support to keep that hope alive.

My point here is that there are times that people indeed want to give up. I don’t necessarily mean people who contemplate suicide, although many more people do contemplate suicide than one would ever guess. I am talking about people who decide to stop trying to live a healthier or more productive life. They simply give up on hopes and dreams, and sort of “go through the motions”.

Please understand that I am not blaming people for their choices. I have not walked in their shoes. I do not know the pain that they faced, nor the troubles that they have experienced. I do say though, that the only failure is giving up hope. The only failure is to not try to live a life that is meaningful.

To be sure, not everyone has the same opportunities, the same gifts. We do all have a life that God has given to us to use until we die. We can live a meaningful life, even when we are disabled, paralyzed, sick, or even terminally ill. The decision to live until we die, not just exist until we die is all in our hands.   

So, take heart dear readers. Look at each day as a gift of time to be used, and cherished.

Prayer: Lord, you give us one day at a time. Help us to cherish that day, Amen

This above all: to thine own self be
true, and it must follow as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to
any man

William Shakespeare (from Hamlet)

I recently talked with a client about being aware of
how he felt and being able to express those feelings safely with others. Some
people struggle to do this because it is a somewhat difficult exercise. This
particular client told me that he believes that he is on the Autism Spectrum,
and that such things come hard to him because he has never really been able to
have a safe place to even bring his feelings to the front of his awareness.

He is having some relationship issues, so he decided that he needed counseling. We discussed the idea that his expression of those inner feelings can be almost invisible to him. When he feels fear or sadness
for example- or a mixture of both- it often comes out looking like anger.
Others, like his wife and adult child, then are hurt by what they see as anger.
My client then gets confused as to how to reconnect with them because he could
not really see how the process played out.  

He is growing and trying new things. I have so much
respect for him because this is new territory for him, and it feels strange and
perhaps scary. What a brave person he is! Trying new things, whatever they
might be, can be daunting and scary.

Yet, when we stretch, we grow.

Prayer: Lord, give us the strength to try new things for growth, Amen

“This is God’s Message, the God who made earth, made it livable and lasting, known everywhere as God: ‘Call to me and I will answer you. I’ll tell you marvelous and wondrous things that you could never figure out on your own.’                                                                                                                                          Jeremiah 33:2-3 (The Message)

So, that is what God said to the prophet Jeremiah. We can’t even begin to understand the marvels of creation.  Every day it seems we learn more about how incredible the human body is designed. Intricacies of animals and insects can scarcely be understood, even by brilliant scientific minds. 

While I was listening to a podcast the other day on my walk (yes, you know I am a podcast addict), I was fascinated by a discussion of the chemical make-up of wasp venom. Yes, I am also a nerd- I like that stuff. At any rate, the podcast host was explaining how there are certain complex enzymes and proteins in the wasp venom that make it incredibly effective. Such detail in the design of a wasp!

We take so much for granted in our creation. Indeed, we get preoccupied with so much noise of bad news around us that we fail to breathe in the wonder of creation and appreciate the most common things in life.

I often tell my clients that the first thing we need to take control of in situations where we feel no control is our breathing. We can take voluntary control of an involuntary function. It helps us to slow down and regain our cognitive control when emotions carry us to an anxious place.

The very act of inhalation and expiration is a complex chemical reaction of enormous proportion. Maybe when we take control of that breathing, we can also be thankful just for the opportunity to do it.

Sometimes I marvel at the innocence of lower life forms who are not sentient and are unaware of their own existence or significance. Maybe, in our own way, we are sometimes just as clueless.

I think that there are marvelous and wondrous things we will never figure out on our own…Prayer: Thank you Lord for this amazing life you have given to us. We are truly fearfully and wonderfully made, Amen.

By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”                                                            John 13:35

Throughout the history of the Christian Church, Christian witness to the world has been demonstrated through benevolent acts of grace to the community. The early Christians were known to take in babies abandoned by Roman families- unwanted babies who had been left out to die. Infanticide was then often considered as a form of birth control.   

Move on to the early and Middle Ages Church which established schools, orphanages, hospitals and schools for the benefit of the community. Today we see the legacy of those movements in so many schools, hospitals, healthcare organizations and non-profit corporations founded by Christian entities for the benefit of the community in which it exists.

The Christian movement has been marked by love of the community in which it resides, and even in places where it does not reside. Love of people, extension of grace and benevolence to friend and stranger are hallmarks of the faith.  

Today, the perception of some of the population is that the Church is known by what it disapproves of rather than for providing love and care for others. How sad that the message that Jesus lived and died for is so misunderstood by so many.

The Church needs to continue to be creative in how it shows love for a broken world- by providing solutions, rather than condemnation. Child care, job training, education, health and mental health care are just a few areas where the Church can impact the world in positive ways.

I am confident that the message still resonates – God so loved the world…

Prayer: Lord, you reminded us that Christians shall be known by their love, Amen

Marriage is not a place to “stand up for your rights.” Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out.                                                                                                                                                                         I Corinthians 7:5 (The Message)

I had the opportunity recently to share an analogy with some clients who are in a difficult marriage situation. I used the analogy of a yoke of oxen. The oxen are yoked together so that they can share the load and pull in the same direction. If one is pulling sideways, or not pulling at all, the whole operation comes to a grinding halt. They are yoked together to share the burden, but also to lighten the load of the other. The yoke, while confining, also helps to leverage the maximum amount of power from the straining oxen.

This couple needed to be reminded periodically that they are on the same team. They are not trying to out-pull the other, or to try to make the burden harder. They are yoked for a reason. If they can remember to see that as they pull together, the burden gets lighter for both, they will be fine.

They are on the same team.

I find that clients who somehow have the belief that their partner does not have their best interest at stake are often not able to stay together. Even when couples are in disagreements, arguments, or just a strained place in the relationship, if they can deep down know that their partner has their back and wants the best for them, they will probably be OK.

So, even when things get tough, remember that your partner wants the best for you, even if it does not feel that way at the moment. I trust that is the case in the majority of stable relationships. Just remind yourself that you are together in it.

Prayer: Lord, help remind us that we are loved, even in the midst of trials, Amen

 Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.  We have come to believe and to know that you are the Holy One of God.”                                                                John 6:68-69

I have been thinking lately about how pervasive the effects of the COVID-19 pandemic have been not only in the United States, but all over the globe. I can only speak directly about what I have seen in the United States, but I want to encourage my readers around the world to consider the changes experienced in your own country, and to share them in this space.

As a result of the pandemic, we have had landmark changes in business, education, politics, health care, religious systems of worship, and how we understand mental health. While I am not an expert on these subjects, I do have a viewpoint on how they interconnect. It has been fascinating, and a bit scary I might add.

When businesses were shutting down early in the crisis, the health care situation was dire indeed. Health care workers could not get enough protective equipment (PPE’S), and some overburdened hospitals even resorted to the use of plastic trash bags as gowns. Morgues in New York were being overrun with bodies. We saw scenes from around the world where coffins could not be made fast enough. Truly, it looked like a scene from a bad sci-fi movie.

Almost immediately, there was pushback about the closing of businesses, churches, and schools. A political rift that had been running under the surface bloomed into a national cleft that remains open today.

I think a crisis like COVID-19 often exposes weaknesses that are already in the system. People who already were struggling a bit with mental health issues such as anxiety and depression were pushed into a crisis state. The increased stress of isolation from others, uncertainty of finances, and worry over very disturbing political news all conspired to spotlight an increase in teen suicide attempts and completions.

Churches found that attendance after the masking and crowd sanctions were lifted have not yet reached pre-pandemic levels. In short, a trend toward lower church attendance was accelerated far beyond expectations.

What does this mean? I think the pandemic simply brought to the surface issues that had been simmering for a long time. When the crisis hit, the rifts became more pronounced.

Should we lose hope? No. This could be a good wake-up call to us that our salvation is not in political solutions or affiliations. Our hope is in our position toward God- humble reflection that we are dependent upon him alone for salvation and true peace.

Prayer: Lord, hear us as we look to you as our salvation, Amen

 a psychological condition that is characterized by persistent doubt concerning one’s abilities or accomplishments accompanied by the fear of being exposed as a fraud despite evidence of one’s ongoing success                          Merriam Webster Dictionary

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful. I know that full well.                                                                                            Psalm 139:14

If one scrolls through social media (not necessarily a hearty recommendation, but it can be useful…), one can find discussion about “imposter syndrome” among some talented professionals. The term, Imposter Syndrome, has been around since the late 1970’s. Have you ever experienced this phenomenon? Very likely, you have to some degree.

I spoke with a client recently who has struggled much of his life with this issue in varying degrees. The irony I found, as I told him, is that this syndrome occurs in people who are so self-aware and who are such high achievers, that they are the people who should worry least about their competence!

People who are highly self-aware, and who also set very high standards for themselves are the people most likely to be afflicted with the problem. I suppose in a way, that this is a variation on the theme that our strengths, when not regulated well, can become our weakness.

Typically, our great fears are fed by the irrational thoughts that can fill our mind when we begin to have doubts and fears. A new job, a promotion, a change in responsibilities, taking on a new financial burden, etc., all can be triggers for latent anxiety to rise to the surface.

It is also true, that when we start a new job, or get into new situations, there is a learning curve. While we are in that curve, when anxiety is higher, the irrational thoughts of Imposter Syndrome can raise their ugly head.

The solution is to be open with trusted others about this situation, and to get good, truthful, and  unbiased feedback. Reminding ourselves of our own intrinsic value is also important, because when one questions their own competence, it can quickly lead to questions of our own value. Taking those irrational thoughts of Imposter Syndrome captive, and then speaking truth to those thoughts can be of great help.

Prayer: Lord, help us to be reminded of our great worth, Amen

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.                                                                             II Corinthians 10:5

I was speaking with a client recently, and we were talking about her loss of confidence in herself. She had been in an abusive marriage and her ex-husband had undermined her confidence. She has been working hard these past few years as a single mom, and she had overcome some significant barriers to become the strong person she needed to be for her daughter.

 Now lately, as she spoke with him on the phone about visitation issues, she found that the discussion became somewhat conflictual, and the old lack of confidence came back. She felt weak and helpless- overwhelmed with her circumstances.

I challenged her with the words from II Corinthians 10:5- “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” Her anxiety had caused these negative thoughts from her past to defeat her at the moment. I told her that this anxiety produced the feelings of helplessness and lack of strength. It undermined her confidence. I reminded her of all that she had done, and continues to do, in order to overcome circumstances and to good care of herself and her daughter. “Feelings will come and go”, I said, “but truth remains”. She needs to take her thoughts captive, decide what is true, and not just accept a current feeling as being the truth. She needs to hold on to the truth- not the lies of her anxiety.  

Sometimes that truth needs to be reinforced by someone outside of ourselves, and this is what I tried to do as her counselor. I reminded her of the truth of who she really is. Sometimes we get caught up in negative self-judgments that are not true. We begin to feel helpless, unworthy, weak, etc.

So, my dear readers, take your thoughts captive and speak truth to those thoughts. Sometimes those negative thoughts are the result of anxiety and depression, and they do not accurately define who we are.

Sometimes, we need another person to remind us of the truth.

Prayer: Lord, thank you for reminders of the truth of who we are in you, Amen