Respect

Honor all people. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the king                                                I Peter 2:17

My definition of respect goes something like this– it is the sincere belief that the person I am working with is able to solve their own problems.

I try to convey that respect to my clients in a number of ways. I affirm their decision to begin counseling. I give them hope that, with work, we can develop some tools that will help them to deal with their problems in an effective way. I tell them that I believe in them, and I point out to my clients the strengths that I see in them. I assure them that what they see as weakness may simply be a strength that they have not yet been able to manage. And yes, I challenge clients to the hard places of healing, because I respect them and care for them.

Often, my clients come into counseling having been living in shame, and perhaps they have been labeled negatively by others. My job is to see their strengths, give them hope that their life can be better, and encourage growth.

I recently had a client who saw himself as weak because he was conflict avoidant. Indeed, that can be a problem. We cannot avoid all conflict in life. Yet, his desire for peacemaking is a noble strength that needs to be managed well. The problem that some peacemakers get into is that they may sacrifice truth for peace, when only the hard truth must be spoken in a situation.

God has shown human beings respect by giving us free will. Indeed, it is true that our choices are often pretty far off the mark, but God has restrained his own power by not limiting our free will to make our own choices.

Prayer: Lord, thank you for the gift of free will. Give us wisdom to use it well, Amen