Handling Anger

If you are angry, do not let it become sin. Get over your anger before the day is finished.                       Ephesians 4:26 (New Life Version)

I spoke yesterday about a client who is dealing with anger. Indeed, I see a number of clients who have concerns about their anger. Often, that concern is spawned by a loved one who has experienced that anger. My new client is here because his anger is getting in the way of a relationship.

Anger is an insidious emotion. We all have it and are capable of it- that is part of being human. Managing it well is another story. The first step is to be able to recognize and own our anger. We often mask it, or call it something else. For example, “I’m not angry, I’m just frustrated!”

As I mentioned in a previous blog, frustration is anger, plus a sense of no ability to resolve a situation. It is a sense of feeling powerless. Just being able to articulate that feeling gives one the power over their own emotions- we have recognized it and owned it. It does not resolve the situation, but we have more clarity and therefore a sense of control to some degree.

Another indicator of anger is sarcasm. Sarcasm is socially acceptable anger. Sarcasm is a way to express anger in a humorous way, and therefore to dissipate it more or less harmlessly. Look at comedians who are so successful in expressing inner hurts and anger in this way. They have found a way to monetize their anger!

So, more to come on this topic in the future.

Blessings!

Prayer: Lord, help us to see the times that we are angry and express it properly, Amen