Advice vs. Opinion

Have two goals: wisdom—that is, knowing and doing right—and common sense. Don’t let them slip away,                                 Proverbs 3:21 (Living Bible)

There is this debate about how counselors should respond to their clients with regard to giving “advice”. I have a simple distinction about “advice vs. opinion”. First, I believe that there should be real clarity about what each term is. Often, clients will ask me “what should I do?” I will then ask, do you want my opinion? I will give an opinion, if I have one, but I make it clear that I am not implying or saying that they should actually do what I am saying. I am simply giving them a point of view- an alternative way of thinking. If they ask my opinion, I will give it, with that caveat.

Advice looks like “You really ought to do this”. I very seldom give that sort of directive. More often, it may more look like “That is something that would not be good to do” – that is, intervening in a behavior that could potentially be destructive to them.  a distinction without a difference, but I try to be clear with my clients that they have agency- they maecisions about their own life. I am their advocate, accountability person, soft landing, encourager, confronter at times, and faithful listener.

I am not their decision maker.

Prayer: Lord, you are the great counselor on whom we rely, Amen