Problem Ownership

Dear friend, pay close attention to this, my wisdom; listen very closely to the way I see it. Then you’ll acquire a taste for good sense; what I tell you will keep you out of trouble                                  Proverbs 5:1-2

I recently spoke with a client, who struggles with anxiety, causing her high need for control. As I have said in the past, we are ALL control freaks. We want as much control as we can get. Understandable. The problem is, there are many things out of our control.

I spoke with the client about the idea of problem ownership. The person owning the problem gets to solve it. She has a hard time because she wants to take care of her family, and make everything right. The problem is, she is not the solver of their problems.

I told her that my definition of respect is trusting that other people can solve their own problems. Certainly, we are glad to help when asked- of course! However, unsolicited advice feels like criticism to the receiver of such advice.

So, we all typically have great motives of wanting to help others, but we must first understand, who owns the problem, and who is responsible to solve it.

Prayer: Lord, help us to discern the best way to love others, Amen