Losses?

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.                                                                                          Colossians 3:15

I spoke with a client recently who has been feeling somewhat downcast, partly due to some prolonged grief, and partly to some “empty nest” syndrome. Nothing approaching major depression, but disconcerting feelings, nonetheless. She is experiencing loss at several levels.

We discussed this sense of loss as part of our life as human beings- an existential phenomenon. We are all experiencing loss in some ways. We are losing parents, friends, co-workers etc. to death as they grow older. We are experiencing loss of routine as our lives change and evolve- kids grow up, we retire, we have physical losses, etc. We are losing some physical capacity also- we don’t hear as well or see as well as we used to. We have joint pain and some minor losses of mobility as we age. In short, we are experiencing loss. It is part of the human condition.

When we think about our losses, we tend to be thinking of a past that no longer exists. How do we stay in the present, enjoying the moment that we are in? I suggested to this client that we develop a gratitude list of things that we are experiencing in the moment. We get up in the morning and we are grateful for the fact that we can live another day. We are grateful for a warm bed, a shower to clean and refresh us, clothes to wear, that cup of coffee, food, a car to drive to work, for work…

You get the picture. We take account of the things that we often take for granted. Things that are actual blessings that others in the world may not enjoy. Such gratitude keeps us in the present, and not looking back to things we had and lost, (or things we are now losing).

I suggested to this client that she actually begin writing those things down. This exercise helps to focus us on things right before us, and it keeps us in the present more and in the past less.

Prayer: Lord, we are grateful for all the blessings that we see, and even those that we don’t, Amen